The X-Men Quadrilogy
of Trilogies
While there were a few landmark pre-2000 superhero movies
like the first Batman and Superman films, as well as things like Spawn and
Blade, the current superhero movie craze that is currently starting to die down
began in earnest with the release of X-Men, followed closely by Spider-Man. So
I’m going to do a few articles about this set of movies. This is one of those
projects that I started back during Phase 2 of the MCU but never completed. So
now is as good of time as any.
X-Men (2000)
The Buildup:
As I’ve mentioned before in other posts, I was out of the
country and didn’t find out about the X-Men movie until literally during
breakfast of the day I was heading to the airport to go back home after more than
18 months of living in Japan. While I was excited, I was also sure that it
would most likely suck and I would have to justify liking it in the same manner
as I did something like Condorman or Supergirl.
The marketing around it was cautious. It assumed that most
people didn’t know what mutants are or who the characters were, so it very
distinctly told them who the good guys and bad guys were in no uncertain terms.
Outside of Patrick Stewart and Halle Berry, it didn’t look like the
star-studded cast that I assumed it would have been. It took me a while to
figure out that Jean was Xenia from Goldeneye, and I later learned that Toad
was Darth Maul. Rebecca Romijn was somewhat known to my brothers for her
notoriety in marrying Uncle Jesse and having also been in Austin Powers 2, but all
of that (again) happened while I was abroad so it was totally new to me. I
learned that Sabretooth was going to be played by a former pro wrestler who I’d
never heard of, Rogue was someone who had been in an artsy-fartsy Oscar-winning
movie in the mid-90’s as a kid, and that pretty much everyone else was unknown,
so I wasn’t overly optimistic. I was particularly worried about an unknown playing Wolverine, especially since he was Australian.
But, it turns out, it didn’t suck. In fact, it was pretty
good. While I would say it wasn’t a total home-run, they at least didn’t screw
anything up. Outside of the uniform color changes, just about everything was a
somewhat streamlined and simplified version of the story and characters from
the comics and animated series. It was also a good jumping-on point for
newcomers who knew nothing of the X-Men or Marvel comics.
The Plot:
The world is beginning to find out about mutants: people who
were born with powers that manifest themselves at puberty. The story follows
Wolverine, who seems to be wanted by a group of mutants (led by Magneto) trying
to establish themselves as the dominant species on the planet. He then meets
the X-Men, a group of mutants (led by Professor Xavier) who have a school to
train young mutants to live in harmony with “normal” people. Magneto doesn’t
want a modern-day repeat of the concentration camps of WWII with mutants and
tries to mutate the world leaders. The X-Men use their abilities and technology
to stop Magneto’s group from causing harm.
What went right:
It took the source material seriously, and didn’t shy away
from code names (for the most part). It had some of the most popular characters
and didn’t overdo it (meaning, it didn’t come on too strongly for normies or
have required reading to understand things, nor did it have too many characters
to keep track of, which is something I kinda thought might happen because
there’s so many good characters to draw from).
It was made (I think) for a mostly new audience who had
never heard of the X-Men before, and was able to communicate this world’s rules
and mutant-related issues really well.
The change from yellow spandex to black leather was probably
the biggest difference, but it was needed to help normies buy into the
superhero concept and evolve it past capes and molded rubber suits. Wolverine poking fun at the names/costumes somewhat helped.
The special effects were good, and it had a nice plot twist
with Magneto and Rogue, as well as the love triangle between Logan/Jean/Scott. The
main villain was relatable and not just power hungry.
While most of the actors were pretty good in their roles,
Patrick Stewart, Hugh Jackman, and Ian McKellen nailed their roles as Professor
X, Wolverine, and Magneto respectively. I
was particularly worried about Wolverine because I heard that Jackman was
Australian, so I thought they were going down the same road as Pryde of the
X-Men as far as his accent/personality went.
What went wrong:
The main criticism I had of the movie at the time was that
there was not enough action, and that Sabretooth and Toad aren’t “actors” as
much as strong/stuntmen. The one glaring problem with some of the
stunt-work that stands out is when Toad
climbs the train station walls it’s pretty obvious that he is just being pulled
up a rope.
Storm’s hair/accent wasn’t great and could have used some
more development time. Also, for someone with a healing factor, Wolverine spent
the most time of anyone being knocked unconscious.
The flip side of appealing to normies is that it skipped
over a lot of really good history and characters to start in the spot that most
people wanted, meaning it didn’t begin with the five original students and
somewhat follow the comics from there – it kinda spotlighted a whittled down
version of the 90’s team. But I understand why it was done.
What I would have
changed:
Mainly I would have fixed Storm’s hair and gotten rid of the
accent, or given her a few more weeks with a dialect coach (and maybe hung out
with Alison Sealy-Smith from the animated series).
I also would have changed it so that it was Jean who stopped
the bullet when Magneto fired the gun outside of the train station. Then
Magneto would have said, “I don’t think SHE can stop them all,” before cocking
every gun.
The music was a bit subdued and conservative, so I would add
a few more recognizable tracks to the score.
X2: X-Men United (2003)
The Buildup:
There was a little more excitement about this film, as this
was no longer something new to most viewers and didn’t have to serve as an
introduction. The superhero movie concept had been elevated since the first
movie as well as the Spider-Man movie so expectations were high. The director
stated that this is the film he wanted to make, but felt like the first one was
kind of a 2-hour trailer for the sequel. In anticipation, X-Men 1.5 was released
on DVD that had the original movie plus some extended scenes and previews for
the sequel.
The Plot:
Wolverine continues to search for clues to his past, while
Professor X is dealing with the aftermath of Magneto’s plot from the first
movie. Colonel William Stryker has declared war on mutants and uses any means
necessary to eradicate them. The X-Men find themselves temporarily homeless,
leaderless, and in the precarious position of having to team up with their enemies
for the common good.
What went right:
It picked up the story a few months after the first one
ended and seemed like a genuine continuation, and all main actors stayed in
their roles (only notable changes were Kitty, Jubilee, and Pyro), with a few new
characters including Pyro, Siryn, and Colossus.
It had a much improved score by John Ottman, which instead
of replacing the motif from the first film actually expands upon it and made it
more epic. The use of Dies Irae during the attack on the White House was particularly
good, as well as showing most of that scene from the POV of the Secret Service. Nightcrawler was excellent in this scene.
There is good allegory to being a mutant is like being gay
(or whatever), and it made a good point about not having to permanently stay
looking “normal.”
It had one of the coolest jailbreak scenes put to film, as well as Wolverine
having a berserker rage.
There are some nice easter eggs for longtime readers, it
fixed Storm’s hair/accent issues from the first film as well as expanding her
role, and had a great teaser for the Phoenix Saga at the end leaving me wanting
to see the next one right away.
The script was good enough that it made us almost start
rooting for the villain, and it had just the right amount of action in it. It
was adapted from a graphic novel called God Loves, Man Kills.
What went wrong:
There was a distinct lack of Cyclops in the film, and
Nightcrawler’s interaction with his mom was a bit weird if you knew.
There are a few things that the writer/director didn’t quite
think all the way through (because dealing with superpowers opens up a can of
worms) such as Iceman being able to help Jean at the end, or what happened to
the kids Colossus helped after Wolverine took the car and escaped, or the fact
that Wolverine should have been able to smell that it was Raven and not Jean in
the tent.
Cracking the neck as shorthand for healing factor is kinda
cliché, and Rogue’s continued inability to use a seatbelt properly was a little
silly, but most of these things are pretty minor.
What I would have
changed:
Had something about Iceman and Storm trying to help Jean in
the last scene but say something to the effect that it was just too much water
to freeze/control all at once.
Maybe add one more scene with Cyclops evading capture and
sneaking around before finally being caught and controlled, and I would have thrown in a
structure collapse preventing escape from the dam at the end that he has to
blast through to give him a little more to do.
X3: The Last Stand (2006)
The Buildup:
With two successful X-Men and Spider-Man films each in the books, the anticipation for
round three was even bigger. However, unbeknownst to the general public, there
was a lot of background studio drama that severely affected how this film
turned out involving executive Tom Rothman’s pissing match with Marvel Comics’
Ike Perlmutter.
The Plot:
Jean
comes back from the dead tremendously powered up, and Magneto intends to use
her as a weapon. Meanwhile, a scientist has developed a cure for mutants, which
has caused a rift in mutantkind. The X-Men deal with both problems when they
collide together, as well as dissent from within after the death of Professor X
and Cyclops.
What went right:
Storm,
Colossus, Iceman, and Shadowcat all got more action. The Danger Room finally
made an appearance, along with the Fastball Special and Sentinels. Iceman
finally iced up all the way. Kelsey Grammer nailed his role as Beast, and some
of the chess themes continued.
What went wrong:
A
lot, and a significant chunk of it can be put at the feet of Tom Rothman, a Fox
executive who had been embarrassed by Bryan Singer’s success with the previous
films. Their pissing contest led to Singer’s firing and James Marsden’s and John
Ottman’s departures. What was left was a mishmash of a script combining ideas
for what was to be (I assume) the third and fourth movies together. They
combined the Cure story with the Dark Phoenix (and skipped right over the first
part of the Phoenix saga) while giving neither story the time to develop
properly. The Dark Phoenix saga is the clearly bigger and more well-known
story, but it took a back seat to the Cure, and turned Jean into Stephen King’s
Carrie, Alcatraz edition. Because both stories were happening simultaneously, it
required cross-country teleportation to make any sense.
The new production also brought along with it a bloated cast with a director who didn’t know
how to do an ensemble movie in the same way that, say, the Russo Brothers could
have done. I also noticed that there is a lot more yelling in this film between
the X-Men. Maybe a reflection of how the production was going?
Callisto is given a combination of Caliban and Quicksilver’s
powers. I’m not against new characters, but there are so many to draw from
there’s no need to just make shit up. Apparently there’s a girl with purple
hair that is called Psylocke, but she’s never mentioned by name, does anything,
or says more than 3 words. Why include her? Also, their take on the Juggernaut
was marginal at best, but what makes it worse is the inclusion of internet meme
culture for a cheap laugh (“I’m the Juggernaut, bitch!”).
Angel’s story might as well not have happened as he never
really did anything that impacted the characters or story, and he felt “tacked
on” for the sake of having a founding team member represented in the movie. It
seemed like parts of the movie were there for shock value (like Xavier dying
out of nowhere) and others were there because the script template said there
had to be an action scene every five pages.
While I liked Ellen Page as Kitty Pryde, she is now the
third actress to portray her, which makes it seem like there wasn’t a lot of
forethought put into casting during the last two films. In other words, I wish it had been her in all three movies. Though there was one
bad part with her – when she was escaping with Leech she should have fully
expected to go through the wall, but instead braced for impact because it wasn’t
a CGI wall like the others. And we suddenly get a “power level” system that isn’t
explained at all, making it seem more like technobabble from a sci-fi movie.
Finally, the post-credit scene is vital for future movies
but it wasn’t well advertised to watch past the credits so I think most people still don't know about it.
What I would have changed:
So much. But the major things would be to keep Bryan Singer
on as director, and make the Cure story the main plot point, with Jean’s
resurrection and transformation into the “good” Phoenix part of the
development, then save the Dark Phoenix story for the 4th movie. Keep Xavier
and Cyclops alive.
